Thursday, June 25, 2009

My horoscope this Week

uh oh:*

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): (My horoscope for the week of June 24th)

A delicious forbidden fruit will be more available than usual in the coming weeks. You can choose to ignore it, of course. You can pretend it's not even there and instead concentrate on the less forbidden fruits that are tasty enough. Or, on the other hand, you can sidle up closer to the forbidden fruit and engage in some discreet explorations, testing subtly to see whether it's any healthier for your sanity than it used to be. I'm not sure what the best decision is, Pisces, but I do suggest this: Don't just rip off all your defenses, forget all your commitments, and start heedlessly taking big bites out of the forbidden fruit.

Funny: that seems to be the theme underlying the Twilight Saga books. I am almost done with the last one of the series, and while I don't feel ready to comment on the whole "message" yet, there is definitely a subtext about controlling one's physical desires. But it's the quotation from Genesis at the beginning of Twilight that is obviously connecting with my horoscope (above) from Rob Brezsny:

Genesis 2:17
But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.

I've been having a recurring nightmare for the past several years where I wake up an hour or two after I fall asleep and can't determine whether I'm still alive, or dead.

I look around my room, and it seems different. I take stock. I look at everything and it feels out of place, and I feel like there is a voice, or a message, telling me that "this isn't real, it's not your real life, you're on the other side now." And it takes me a good 5 minutes or so to figure out that I'm actually alive.

This nightmare went away for a while, but has been back in full effect recently. I wonder if my Twilight obsession is feeding in to this - the idea of eternal life mixed up with eternal death. It's very unsettling. I've been thinking that this is happening because of my big birthday coming up.... but maybe not. Do you all have any ideas?

* I don't generally put a whole lot of stock in horoscopes. I don't think they predict the future. But I do think that one should take a close look at "coincidences" and see if there is a message from the Divine that I should be listening to. The stained glass is from Chartres Cathedral, in France.

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